The Shop is Closed!

This past weekend I babysat my younger cousin, and by younger I mean she's 8...or 9. I'm not sure how old she is, I just know that she pretty much guaranteed that PoS will be my one and only child.  Before you start on the oh you're so young, you should have more kids crap, let me tell you, it ain't gonna happen.

I'm a firm believer that you get the kid you raise.  If you want a reader, you read a lot.  If you want a jock, you watch and/or play sports and get them involved in sports.  If you want an obnoxious brat...well, you see where I'm going with this.  This child was none of those things I mentioned.  What she was is what a typical 8 year old is, bored all the time.

We're a self-sufficient household.  PoS and I come in after school and work.  I cook, she watches TV.  We eat dinner, she does homework, I watch TV and tweet.  We go to sleep, get back up in the morning and do the same thing.  Our routine only changes on the weekends when I chauffeur her around. Then we come home, cook, eat, watch TV, tweet and sleep.

When I first volunteered to watch this kid, I did it because...I'm not sure why. I must have been in a good and lovely mood.  As the day drew nearer, I started to panic.  This is a kid that ends up in the hospital with asthma at least every other month.  Her mother was completely nonchalant about giving me the info I asked for.  I didn't need the kid's full medical history, but I did want to know what medication she was on; her doctor's name, address, phone, etc.; which hospital she frequented the most, etc. I didn't think I was asking for much.  I mean, this kid was going to be with me from Friday until Monday.

Friday comes, I pick the kid up and right away PoS claims I'm being mean by sending her to the last row of the minivan.  Actually I was thinking about her safety, but whatever.  We got home and she surveyed her surroundings and quickly scurried to the couch which was to become her bed and best friend for the next few days.  Surprisingly, PoS took the time to show her how to work the cable and how to use whatever gaming system she has.  They were chatting it up so well that I decided I'd leave her with PoS while I went to a book event that night.

Ninety minutes later I returned home to find the kid happily playing the game while PoS was sprawled out on the second couch with heavy lids.  She had promised the kid that she'd stay downstairs with her until she fell asleep, but it was apparent that the 9 p.m. bedtime her mother swore by was all a farce. I sent PoS to bed, left a light on for the kid and told her I'd see her in the morning.  Mind you, I didn't send her to bed. It was Friday. I believe in letting kids stay up until they pass out, especially if it means undisturbed silence for me on Saturday morning.

Saturday rolls around and I cook a breakfast fit for a queen.  We eat and she announces that she's bored.  Oh really? Would you like me to tap dance for you, little one?  Ok, I didn't say that, but that's what I was thinking. We headed out for Saturday errands and though a trip to the zoo was on the agenda, her mother sent her with a suitcase full of shorts.  If she had bothered to check the weather, she would have seen that we were expecting highs in the 60s and packed accordingly.  She did not, so the zoo was ruled out.  Instead we came back home and I did what I do after running around all Saturday, I took a nap.

To be fair, I asked before I headed upstairs if she was hungry.  Keep in mind that breakfast was at 9 and it was now 3 p.m.  She told me no.  When I emerged from my slumber 3 1/2 hours later, she was still in the same spot on the couch.  And guess what? She was finally hungry.  Oh, and she was bored.  I guess there wasn't enough on Nickelodeon, Cartoon Network and Boom to keep her occupied.  Well I can't entertain you, but I can certainly feed you.  PoS was nice enough to watch TV with her after dinner, but set a firm bedtime of 9 and the kid adhered to it.

Sunday was a repeat of Saturday except we didn't leave the house.  You know what I do on Sundays? I watch football.  PoS does homework.  This kid whined about being bored from the time she woke up until she went to bed.  My Mommy Block was in full effect and I tuned her out.  If you don't know what Mommy Block is, it's something you develop when you have kids.  It allows you to tune them out just enough so you can focus on what you really want to be doing, while tuning in just enough to nod and respond at the appropriate times.  I've had seventeen years to fine tune mine, did this kid really think she was going to break me down? I think not.



I won't tell you how loudly my tires screeched as I pulled out of the school parking lot.  People that have kids years apart, I applaud you.  Actually I don't. I wonder what in the heck you were thinking.  There is no way that I would start over from scratch and do this again.  The shop is closed!

 

Colleges That Change Lives or How to Eliminate Schools on Your List in 60 Minutes or Less

The other night PoS and I attended a college fair sponsored by the good people at Colleges That Change Lives.  I highly recommend it to anyone with a student trying to find a school that fits them.  The initial speakers were funny and informative and then they turned a room of 450 people loose on a group of about admissions counselors representing approximately forty schools.

PoS and I had scanned the list before arriving and five of the ten schools on her list were going to be in attendance.  Before going in I told her I wasn't going to do any question asking for her.  If she wanted to know something about a school, it would be up to her to ask.   I have no desire to be a helicopter or lawnmower parent.  I can't take any tests for her, speak in interviews for her, etc.  I thought this would be the perfect time to let her take charge.  So while the well mannered PoS is trying to be respectful of those around her, the parents of others were pushing her out of the way to grill the counselors for their kid.  I was hot, I was sick, I was hopped up on TheraFlu, I stepped back and let her do her thing.

An enthusiastic recent grad of Knox College earned them a rating of 7 out of 10 when she informed PoS that while their school didn't have a criminology program, they do work closely with the local police department and students have been known to intern with them.  (In case you're joining us late, she wants to eventually be a criminal profiler and wants to double major in psychology and criminology).

The representative from Ohio Wesleyan was very blah in my opinion.  While other schools had other kids crowding around them, this table had just PoS.  The lady couldn't muster up enough enthusiasm for me to justify a visit, but PoS gave them a 6.

We stopped by the Rhodes table long enough for PoS to discern that it was not the school for her.  Why, you may ask. "It's all Harry Potter castle like. And Memphis is the big city. I'm not ready for the big city."  The way she talks, you would think we live on a farm.  We live in a big city!  But whatever. I crossed it off the list and kept it moving.  At this point I was working my way through my second bag of cough drops so whatever got us out of there sooner worked for me.

The next stop was Beloit.  I've been talking to a recent grad of the school on Twitter and she gushes about the greatness of Beloit.  This is a school that wasn't on PoS' list until I added it as something she might want to look into.  The admissions director was lively, regaling the kids with stories of the football team's recent win.  I didn't even think the school had a football team, but I'm a Big 10 snob.   Anyway, it's weird what impresses people.  PoS was excited about the various student clubs, including the DJ Club and other things.  It wasn't so much that she wanted to join the clubs listed, she was excited that the school allowed them to exist.  She was also a big fan of the "create your major" approach the school takes.  Beloit scored the highest of the night with an 8.

Our last stop was at the Lawrence table.  I was disappointed for various reasons.  My cousin is a graduate of the university and has been talking it up for years.  However, the representative only seemed to light up when she talked about their music program.  Yes, their music program is renowned, but the three kids standing in front of her were all interested in psychology, which happens to be a popular major at Lawrence.  She couldn't muster up enough enthusiasm to talk about it for more than a minute before drifting back to the music program.  PoS gave them a 5.

Right after that we decided to make a run for it.  PoS said, and I agreed, that there was no need to add any additional schools to the list.  It took long enough to get the list down to a manageable number, no need in heading in the opposite direction.  By the way, I reminded her that Northeastern and Boston University are both in the big city of Boston.  Her reply? "Yeah, but Boston is full of schools. Whatever. I'm weird, I know."

Easing Student Debt

Tempestt Hazel graduated from Columbia College with $25,000 in student loans and a keen awareness that she was going to need to start paying them off if she didn't head straight to graduate school.

So the Bronzeville resident put herself on Lilyslist.com, an online student loan registry.

"I see it as a kick-starter, an online resource for people to get creative process funding," said Hazel, who studied art history and visual arts management and is currently working on a nonprofit startup archiving local contemporary art projects. "You get people to come and donate different amounts toward your cause."

She said she has received a few small anonymous donations toward her loans, which she said was "shocking, though it could have very well been family members."

Lily's List is an Internet startup designed by a group of suburban Riverside moms to provide debt-laden graduates a way to get help paying off their debt. The Project on Student Debt estimated in 2008 the average student loan load for graduating seniors was $23,200.

At lilyslist.com, family and friends -- or even a generous anonymous benefactor -- can direct gifts toward debt instead of writing a check or buying a sweater for birthdays or graduation.

Joining Hazel in asking for help on Lily's List are a Minnesota law school graduate with $20,000 in unsubsidized loans who wants to be a priest but doesn't want his loans to accrue interest while he is in the seminary; a Tennessee man looking to pay off $4,500 in loans so he can start an import/export business, and a New York-based writer and editor who offers writing and editing to charitable organizations at reduced rates.

Money given through the site isn't "going to a party or a dress or a keg of beer, it's going to go someplace," said Beverly Gibson of Riverside, who is working with Lily's List.

Lily's List joins Education registry.com and upon ourstar.com, two other online student loan registries. Those websites target engaged couples or new parents who would rather register for their student loans or for their child's future education than standard wedding or new baby gifts.

"This speaks to what a burden this is for people," said Edie Irons of the Institute for College Access and Success. "Most people aren't going to be able to zero out their student loan debt this way, but it could make a real difference for people. It could be more helpful than a blender or microwave or crockpot."

Irons said in the age of increasing student debt loads, asking for help isn't the same as shirking responsibility.

"I think any way people can find to pay back their student loans is fair game," she said.

Source

Early Decision vs. Early Action

In my quest to make sure we don't miss any deadlines, I've created a spreadsheet of schools PoS is applying to along with scholarship information.  As I was creating the list I noticed that some schools had early decision dates, some had early action dates and a few had both.  It hasn't been THAT long since I applied to college.  Ok, fine, it's been over 20 years, who asked you.  Anyway, I had no clue as to what the difference was between the two so I turned to Google.

In simple terms, early decision means that the school you're applying to is your first choice.  Your application is binding and should you be accepted, you are obligated to attend. Because of this, you can only apply to one school as an early decision.  The deadline tends to be November 1, though a few schools give you until December 1.  Early action simply means that you'd like to know sooner rather than later that you've been accepted into an institution, but you're not obligated to attend.

So we've got that straight and deadlines are set for applying.  But before we can jump that hurdle, we have to apply for special visitation programs at two of the universities.  Remember those road trips I planned? Yeah, well these schools have their own plans.  PoS received invitations to visit Carleton College, which wasn't on her list even though she wanted to apply there (long story), all expenses paid including her flight.  The catch is she has to submit essay questions, her senior schedule and a transcript in the next week or so.  Miami Ohio has a similar weekend that she's been invited to, but theirs requires two essay questions, recommendations from her counselors and additional info, all due next week. I feel like we're pre-applying to apply.  Needless to say, road trips are on hold until we find out if she's been accepted for those trips.

The silver lining in the cloud is that five of the ten schools she's interested in will be in town in a few weeks at a fair and she'll get to speak with their admissions counselors.  Hopefully this will give her a better feel for which schools she still wants to apply to and which can come off the list.  In the meantime I'll keep counting pennies, waiting for the go ahead to load up the van and set off on an adventure.